


You Could Say That Your Demons Excite Me

by firesbender



Category: All Time Low (Band), Halsey (Musician), Lights (Musician) - Fandom, The Maine (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Demons, Anal Sex, Comfort, Demon Powers, Demon Sex, Demons, M/M, Missionary Position, Oral Sex, Rimming, Sex, Shapeshifting, Supernatural Elements, Transformation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-30
Updated: 2019-11-30
Packaged: 2021-02-26 15:21:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21620311
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/firesbender/pseuds/firesbender
Summary: John’s acting a little out of sorts, which may have something to do with the fact he’s slowly transforming into a demonic entity.ain't my boys. title to every other man by he is we.mibba versionentered inthe "i'll finish it later" challenge
Relationships: Alex Gaskarth/John O'Callaghan
Kudos: 6





	You Could Say That Your Demons Excite Me

**Author's Note:**

> so this was sent in as a [prompt to alltimefanfiction](https://alltimefanfiction.tumblr.com/post/175182228476/story-idea-person-a-is-bitten-by-a-demon-and) and it immediately inspired me. the last thing i needed was another idea to write but the need to do it took hold of me and it was hard to shake off… and i really liked this idea. it was supposed to be porn with a tiny bit of plot to it and then it accidentally became a whole fucking project and now it’s been over a year in the making. it took even longer to finish this because i wrote a lot of it on paper while at work to pass the time and transferring it from paper to online was… tiresome. but we got there in the end! i picked callakarth for the pairing because john turning into a demon is just… completely the opposite of what he’s like as a person.
> 
> this is also the first callakarth fic i have ever managed to post! definitely not the first i’ve written but it’s the first to make it to the completed, ready-to-post stage. i'm not 100% fully happy with how it ends and i also despised writing it so much by the end that i hardly beta'd it so if you see any mistakes, P L E A S E tell me. but overall i am very pleased at having finally completed it and if you read it, i would love a comment!
> 
> just as an fyi, the anon asked for someone to also write a jalex version, so if anyone wants to do that… they should. i’d read it. lemme know if you do and i’ll link it right here for ya.

Nobody really expects that a night out will end in life-altering circumstances. A few drinks, a little dancing, you stagger home… but sometimes not. 

Car accidents, spiked drinks, a drunken fight, stumbling and falling down some stairs… any of it could change everything. 

Unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately, John O’Callaghan didn’t experience any of those things. His situation was a little more unusual than most, but no less shocking. 

It started when the night ended, staggering down the street with his friends in search of a taxi bay that wasn’t totally crawling with way too many people. 

John was lagging a little behind the group, partly because he was getting tired of walking and partly because he had to pee. He passed a wide alleyway, empty apart from some large trashcans, and it seemed a good enough spot as any to piss in public. He wandered down a little, though, not wanting to be _too_ close to the entrance, because John still had a conscience despite the alcohol.

It was only about halfway down that he decided to stop, but that was far enough. 

It was very cold all of a sudden. So cold, in fact, that he was shivering immediately. 

He couldn’t explain what it was exactly, but a feeling of absolute dread accompanied the chill in the air. It overwhelmed him, and though nothing physically hit him… John felt winded. He stumbled, fell back against the wall, clutching at his chest. It took a few seconds for him to catch his breath again, the cold feeling passing as he did so. 

“Too drunk,” he muttered to himself as he stood up, taking slow, shaky steps to exit the alley. 

Deciding just to piss at home, he straightened his shirt and quickened his pace, breaking into a jog to catch up with the others… and get as far away from that alleyway as possible. 

+++

It’s two days later and John knows something is wrong.

“Alex, my head hurts.” 

“It’ll just be a two-day hangover, babe.” 

“No, this doesn’t feel like a hangover. I’m really achy and shivery but… hot? I’m hot and cold, I can’t explain it. And my head… God, my head.” 

“What’s the matter with it?” Alex frowns, standing up from the armchair to feel John’s forehead. “You don’t feel hot… maybe a little clammy.” 

“It’s just… it’s just the top of my head? It hurts so bad. It’s like… you know that really tender feeling you get under the skin before a pimple comes up? It’s that, but intensified by, like… a gazillion.”

Alex crinkles his brow, bemused. “That’s… specific.” 

John doesn’t even humour him, just presses the palms of his hands to his eyes and whines, “It really hurts, Alex.”

“Okay, okay, I’m no doctor, but it all kinda sounds like the flu,” Alex decides, placing one hand on John’s shoulder and the other on the small of his back, turning him towards the bedroom. “I think we should get you laid down, some soft music on, lots of water… how does that sound?” 

John just nods and allows himself to get tucked into bed like a child. 

+++

John stays in bed all day. He’s still there when Alex gets in beside him at ten that night. He barely stirs at the addition to the bed. But at midnight, he wakes up. Every inch of his skin feels prickly and he groggily drags himself to the bathroom to pee. 

When he’s washing his hands, he bends low to splash his face with water at the sink, still feeling as if he’s too hot. But that’s when he also gets the distinct feeling that something is wrong. Slowly, he lifts his head, water dripping from his chin, and gasps lightly at his reflection. 

He’s convinced he’s dreaming. There are two tiny _points_ poking out of his forehead, a little below his hairline. They’re black in colour, and John’s so sore and tired and shocked that he can’t do anything but stare at them. He doesn’t want to dare think the word ‘horns’ but that’s what they are. 

Dazed and still in pain, he shakes his head at the reflection and returns to bed. 

“Fucking hallucinating,” he mutters. 

+++

“Good morning, sunshine.”

John blinks awake to see Alex’s smiling face beaming down at him, holding out an orange juice in one hand and a coffee in the other. 

“What time is it?” John croaks as he sits up, noting how he feels far less achy today. 

“Almost eleven -- I figured you needed the extra sleep. You’ve got work this afternoon though, remember. Unless you feel like you should call in sick.”

John sips his coffee, shaking his head. “The sleep and all the water you were force-feeding me yesterday must’ve done the trick because I feel a lot better.”

Alex smiles and kisses his forehead, and that’s when John remembers. 

+++ 

“John, could you give Ashley a hand? It’s getting pretty busy up there,” Garrett asks. 

Garrett’s the kind of guy who totally doesn’t look like he could be a manager, with the untrimmed beard and wild hair and quirky clothes… but he is. And he’s a good one. He’s fair and John likes him but he still feels a little odd trying to befriend his boss even though they’re the same age. 

John heads up behind the counter beside his blue-haired co-worker and starts taking coffee orders. Garrett’s right -- it is busy, but John’s quick and efficient with a coffee machine. 

No matter how fast he and Ashley work, though, people get rude and impatient. 

“How long does it take to make a cup of tea?” 

“Why was his order served first? I ordered before him!” 

“Can’t you get another employee over to help?” 

“Excuse me, did you hear what I ordered? I don’t see it being made yet!” 

Complaints roll in from people desperate for their lunchtime caffeine fix -- it was normally pretty annoying but John feels like his blood is boiling. 

He politely tells everyone to be patient, and places two to-go cups on the end of the counter. Before he can even call the order, one customer shoves forward and in her haste, knocks both cups over. The hot liquid goes everywhere, even into the tip dish, and it ruins several baked goods. Ashley just narrowly avoids being scalded. 

“For goodness sake!” the woman snaps. “You should’ve put them in cup-holders! That nearly went on my shoes!” 

John can’t contain the anger any longer. “Are you kidding me?” he snaps. “My co-worker almost got burned, there’s now a mess to clean up at one of the busiest points of our day, and it was _your_ fault… and you’re mad about your damn shoes?!” 

“Excuse me?” the woman blinks, bemused by the reaction. 

Even Ashley is shocked; she’d never seen her colleague react that way even to the rudest of customers. “John… it’s okay. I’ll get a cloth.” 

“It’s not okay! She was being impatient and downright rude, and now she hasn’t even apologised for the spillage and for almost hurting you!” he shouts, drawing the attention of some of the seated customers, who were beginning to stand up to see what the commotion was about. “It’s ridiculous behaviour!”

“I’ll be putting a complaint in tomorrow, I don’t need to listen to this,” the woman huffs, turning and leaving the cafe.

Customers began muttering among themselves, some laughing, but John couldn’t hear what was being said. He’d been struck with a blinding headache, and that dreadful feeling that something was very wrong. So he runs, bolting past a confused Ashley to the staff bathroom. He reaches the mirror just in time to see horns again, accompanied by claws in place of fingernails, and completely black eyes -- no whites, no colour. His skin feels burning hot to the touch, and he has fangs; small, but sharp, similar to that of a vampire. 

Everything about his body feels different even if he looks mostly the same -- he feels powerful. Stronger. Faster. 

But he shuts his eyes, shocked and fearful at what he’s seeing. It’s not a dream. It’s definitely not a hallucination. His rage quickly passes, heart pounding after seeing his reflection, and when he opens his eyes… he’s normal again. No horns, no claws, no nothing. 

He breathes a small sigh of relief… small, because although he doesn’t have to deal with this at work, he’s still going to have to deal with it at some point. 

“John?” 

John jumps, turning around to see Ashley peeking her head around the door -- he’d forgotten to lock it. Or even close it properly. But she didn’t look totally horrified so he assumed she hadn’t witnessed his bizarre transformation. 

“Y-yeah?” 

“You okay?” she asks, opening the door properly and leaning against the frame, tossing her bright blue hair over her shoulder. “I’ve never seen you get that pissed before.”

John laughs it off, shrugging awkwardly. He hadn’t been able to help it, but he was a little embarrassed thinking back over his reaction now. “Uh, yeah… sorry I snapped. I just-- I guess I just woke up on the wrong side of the bed today.”

“Nah, it’s okay,” Ashley smiles. “Thanks for sticking up for me with that woman.” 

“No worries. Is Garrett pissed at me for losing it on a customer?” 

“Actually, no. Apparently he’s dealt with that lady before and he despises her. She’s gonna get an earful from him if she does come back to complain tomorrow.” 

John chuckles. “Oh, well… at least that’s something.” 

“Yeah. Come on, you need to get back out here.”

“On it.” 

Ashley turns and leaves, and John goes to follow, but not before throwing a look back towards the mirror. He’s still normal; green eyes looking straight back at him. 

Something tells him it won’t last.

+++

Nobody likes making calls to customer service, least of all John. He normally finds himself too polite to tell them to fuck off even when they’re being complete dicks. 

But he knows he just has to suck it up and make these kinds of calls sometimes, even if it always sucks a good forty-five minutes of his life away. 

He and Alex had been having trouble with their internet, despite their provider claiming to be the best around. This is how John finds himself on the phone to them, thirty minutes deep into a conversation about how they’re late on their payments even though they’re definitely not. 

John takes deep breaths, tries to remind himself it’s not that big of a deal, but no matter what, that blood-boiling rage he’d become all too familiar with still reared its ugly head. He feels the brief flash of pain in his forehead and he wishes he had just made Alex make the call before all rational thought flies right out the window. 

“The payments aren’t fucking _late_!” he bellows, launching the house phone across the livingroom. 

The plastic device smashes into the wall, partially shattering at the corner. It makes one defiant beep when it hits the carpet and then seems to die. 

“John,” Alex says in disbelief from behind him, having woken from a nap at the sound of John’s yelling. “What the hell did you do that for?”

John feels another flash of pain in his head, and then his fingertips, and he knows by now he’s only seconds away from becoming his hideous alter ego. He snarls uncontrollably at the frustration of it all as he dashes past Alex and runs for the bathroom. 

But Alex has had enough. John’s been acting like a crazy person for weeks and he’s kind of sick of just watching it happen. He follows John, lightly pushing at the bathroom door. It opens, having been left off the latch, and it gives Alex enough of a view to see it happen. 

The moment his boyfriend sprouts horns and claws, black as night. 

“What the fuck,” Alex breathes, and it’s less a question and more just a statement of complete horror. “Oh my God.” 

He can’t seem to do anything but stare, frozen to the spot as he tries to make sense of what he’s seeing. The moment of stiff fear lasts only mere seconds but it feels like a lifetime later when Alex realises he can lift his feet. He takes one small step backwards, wondering if he can just bolt right out the front door without John noticing. 

Of course, that’s the moment John turns his head and notices Alex standing there. Alex gasps upon seeing that John’s once green and golden eyes are now like dark pools, no white left. 

For John, it’s a different story. He feels no terror looking at Alex. He feels something completely new, rather. 

He can’t contain it after a few more seconds, and he lunges for Alex. John wraps his arms around his boyfriend, claws catching on his clothes, and he kisses him. 

Alex stiffens, unable to believe what he’d just seen. He doesn’t kiss back, but John doesn’t seem to take the slightest bit of notice. He just keeps pushing Alex in the direction of the couch, claws finally piercing his clothes. Alex hears the sound of fabric ripping, and then he’s being thrown down on the couch with a force that jerks his neck -- John’s never had that level of strength in him in all the time that Alex has known him. 

Only now, when John can see Alex’s face as he stands over him, does he realise how terrified his boyfriend looks. John doesn’t recognise the look; he’s never seen Alex so scared. 

His demon form melts away as quickly as it came, guilt overcoming his lust. 

“Alex, I’m so sorry, I’m sorry, it’s me, I’m-- I’m so fucking sorry, oh my God,” John babbles, sitting down on the couch beside him and gently pulling his boyfriend to sit up properly. “I didn’t mean-- I didn’t realise I was scaring you.”

It takes a few more minutes of apologising and reassuring hugs from one to the other to bring them out of their shock, or at least the worst of it. Alex finds himself stroking his hair, telling him it’s okay and that he’s not mad or scared now, he just wants to talk. 

“It’s okay, just calm down, we’re okay.”

“I’m just really sorry,” John repeats softly.

“John, I just… I don’t even know-- I don’t know what to say or-- I-- what was that?” Alex stammers, feeling more than just a little in shock now that he’s trying to make sense of the situation. “Has that-- has that been happening for a while? Is that why you’ve been acting so weird lately?” 

John nods, swallowing down the hours upon hours of fear over telling Alex the truth. “Yes. I, uh, I don’t really know what it is. From what I could stomach to research, I think I’ve been morphing into a… a demon? I feel like a lunatic even saying that out loud. But I have the… the qualities and characteristics of one. It’s the best I can come up with.” 

Alex doesn’t hesitate in reaching for John’s hand, squeezing it tightly, and John has to blink back hot tears from the relief of just talking about it. 

“John,” Alex says softly, inching closer to him on the couch. “It’s okay. You’re okay. When did this start?” 

John takes a deep breath, more than ready to spill all the weird things going on with him as of late. 

“Do you remember that night out we had? And I was feeling really unwell a couple days after, and you thought it was the flu?”

“You’re saying you got sick and turned into a demon?” 

“No, no, not exactly -- I think me feeling sick was just how it was… manifesting? Look, that night I felt sick, I got up to go to the bathroom after you came to bed, and my reflection in the mirror had horns and black eyes. And I think that was it starting, y’know? My body getting used to transforming? It went away after a few seconds and I still didn’t feel great… I thought I was imagining it.” 

Alex nods, but he still looks understandably puzzled. “So… you felt sick and then it happened, but… was that definitely the first time? Are you sure you didn’t start feeling run down or anything before that?” 

“No, that was definitely the first I felt sick, but I think it actually started on the night out. I’ve been thinking about it a lot, and I was really drunk… I don’t remember it all that well. But we were walking down this street, and I was kinda lagging, and I passed this alleyway… look, Alex, I can’t explain it, but I remember I just felt so drawn to it. I just wanted to go stand in that alleyway, so I did. If I were sober, I might’ve been scared, but…” John trails off, looking thoughtful. “I think I was only standing there for a few seconds and I just can’t remember if anything happened. But I do know that I felt a weird _energy_ in there. You know I’m not religious or spiritual or whatever but I swear to God, I felt something. And now this is happening.” 

Alex swallows before he speaks, his brow wrinkling. “I’m sorry if I’m making this sound like a bad horror movie but… are you thinking you got possessed by something in that alley?” 

“No! No, not-- I mean, I don’t think. Possession just seems too extreme? I know I have nothing to compare it to but I still feel like me when I’m… when I change. Not like something else is taking over me. I’m just me but with really intense moods? Something must’ve happened to me in that alley but not possession.” 

“And it happens -- your change -- when you get angry?” Alex clarifies. 

John is surprised. “How did you know?” 

  
“Because of how weird you’ve been acting!” Alex laughs, giving his boyfriend a nudge. “I’ve been watching. You’d run away from me, or anyone, really, whenever you got annoyed. Which has been a lot lately, and it’s not like you. I’m just putting two and two together.”

John smiles a little, leaning against Alex. “Yeah. If I get even mildly irritated, it just… it blows up out of control and I get so enraged. And then I change into this demon version of me. But it does other stuff too.”

“Like…?”

“Like… my sex drive. When I’m-- when I wanna have sex, it’s just…” 

“Intense?” Alex chips in.

“Yes!” John nods. “Exactly. It’s a bit overwhelming.” 

“I felt it. The last couple times we’ve slept together, I mean. You seemed… frantic.” 

“Oh,” John bites his lip, slightly embarrassed. “Sorry. I thought I was hiding it better than that.” 

“No, it’s okay,” Alex chuckles, pressing his lips to John’s cheek. “I liked it. But you didn’t sprout any horns?” 

“I know, it’s weird -- I think I can control it better at certain times? I don’t know why. So far, the physical change only seems to happen when I get mad.” 

“Maybe it’s because sex is a good thing?” Alex suggests. “Like… okay, I know lust is sinful or whatever, maybe that’s why sexual feelings are more intense now. But anger is just… it’s not productive, but you and I having sex is a good thing, something that strengthens us and brings us closer. So the demon side is less likely to appear?” 

“I don’t know… maybe.”

“I’m just spit-balling.” 

John sighs, shrugging. “I’m less concerned with the ‘why’ of it all and more… I just want it to stop? Or to control it better? I don’t exactly feel like I can waltz into a hospital or… or a therapist’s office and tell them I’m turning into a demon. Or a demon-like creature. Or whatever this is.” 

Alex considers their options, rubbing thoughtfully at the scruff on his chin. “Have you thought about exorcism…?” 

“I feel like that implies I’m being possessed by an evil entity, and I’m pretty sure I’m not,” John makes a face, not totally relishing the thought of an exorcism as several scenes from horror movies pass through his mind. “I don’t know if that’s the route we should go down…” 

“Okay, maybe we don’t necessarily need to get you exorcised, but I do feel like we should talk to someone with a little more expertise on the matter.” 

“Meaning…?”

“Have you ever heard of a demonologist?” Alex asks, already Googling a number for one on his phone.

“A what now?” 

+++

John absolutely thought Alex was making it up, but it turns out demonologists are real, and two days after their initial conversation, there’s one in his apartment. 

She’s not at all what he expected, either. 

Alex had found her website; apparently being a demonologist was a side-job to a photography business she owned with her husband, and she’d been interested in witchcraft since childhood. She was from Canada but lived locally now, and her hourly rates seemed reasonable enough, so Alex had given her a call. Part of John was convinced they were being ripped off, but at the same time, he was pretty desperate to get to the bottom of this, so he supposed he didn’t really have a choice. 

She was a dainty woman -- average height, but very slender, and coated in tattoos. Not to mention, she had a head of Ariel-red hair all down her back, and a septum piercing. 

Again, not at all what John expected. 

But then, he had no idea what an average demonologist looked like, so maybe this was it. 

“I know it says Valerie on my website, but you can call me Lights,” she announces cheerfully as she accepts a coffee from Alex, seated in their armchair. “So why don’t you guys sit down and tell me a little more about what you’re dealing with? That way, I can decide the best course of action to help you.” 

It takes a nudge from Alex before John actually takes a seat and starts talking, unable to believe his life had come to this. 

But he takes a seat, accepts his own coffee from Alex, and tells Lights the whole story. From the night out, until now, every detail he could recall about what he was going through. If there was a chance she could help, he might as well take full advantage. 

Lights listened intently, rarely asking questions, but occasionally placing her mug down and jotting notes into an expensive-looking notebook that she’d brought. Her fountain pen had little ghosts printed on it, which was only mildly amusing. 

“...and now you’re in our livingroom, so I guess we’re desperate for answers.” 

“Understandable,” Lights smiles, and it’s a very warm smile. John feels comforted by it. “Are you ready to hear what I think?” 

John looks at Alex, and then back at Lights, nodding eagerly. 

“Okay,” she takes a breath, glancing over the notes she’d taken. “You haven’t been possessed. What you describe is definitely not possession, so you were right about that. You don’t need an exorcism.” 

John lets out a sigh of relief. “Thank God, because I’ve seen movies, and they look ugly.” 

Lights laughs. “It’s not always like that, but they don’t tend to be fun, no. There’s no exorcism required here.” 

“So, what exactly is required? Is it a demon, that’s affecting him?” Alex presses.

Lights sits forward in the chair, ready to explain. “Right, so, what you need to understand is that a demon is a spirit. An entity. They do not exist in a physical form. They _can_ possess physical beings, but they don’t all have the desire to, and there are many different types of demons. They are _not_ all malevolent, but they do tend to have other negative qualities -- like being overly lustful, or mischievous, or short-tempered… sometimes they just like causing trouble. But not ‘trouble’ the way movies may have led you to believe like murder and bloodshed and destroying the human race and everything. That’s a very extreme type of demon, and not what we’re dealing with here.”

Another sound of relief leaves John’s mouth. 

“What we _are_ dealing with, is a little more complicated to explain,” Lights continues. “You’re not being possessed, but a human also can’t just ‘become’ a demon either. It just doesn’t work like that. However, what you’re experiencing -- the mood swings, the physical changes -- is a direct result of a demon.” 

“I don’t understand,” Alex pipes up. “So he’s not turning into a demon?” 

“Technically… no. Just a human with demonic qualities.” 

“But it did happen _because_ of a demon?” John clarifies. 

“That’s correct,” Lights nods. “Like I said, demons can be mischievous, especially when they decide to roam around the human world. They like to cause trouble and play pranks for fun. I believe what you may be experiencing is a prank, or possibly a poorly thought-out gift, from a rather vexatious, but ultimately harmless, demon.”

“So… I have horns sprouting from my head and claws for fingernails and a near-uncontrollable rage bursting out me at any given moment… because a supposedly mythical creature wanted to play a _prank_?” 

Lights looks apologetic. “Well. Yeah. Basically.”

John feels the anger start to rise. Not at Lights -- no, she’d been incredibly helpful, and had given more answers than the internet had, obviously. It was just rather annoying that his entire life had been turned upside down all because a demon wanted to have a little fun. He tries his best not to get too bogged down in that, but it’s too late, and the headache starts. 

“Motherfucker,” he mutters, rising from his seat and clutching his face in his hands. He doesn’t want to go full demon in front of Lights but he realises it might be helpful so he stays put, the pain subsiding as he changes. “I’m sorry, I-- it’s not you, I’m just… I’m so fucking mad.” 

“Don’t be sorry,” Lights stands up from the armchair, gently peeling John’s hands from his face and taking in his new appearance. “Fascinating. Do you might if I photograph this? I want to look into it a little further when I get home, but I’d like a visual to work off of.”

John sighs. “Yeah, sure, just… I mean, you’re not gonna sell these photos or anything, are you?” 

  
Lights looks appalled. “No! No, don’t be silly. Think of this like doctor/patient confidentiality. I’m not even going to show my husband these photographs. This is my work, not his. You paid me to come here and help you, and that’s what I intend to do. Not sell you out.” 

She retrieves her camera from her backpack, and takes several photos of John -- some full-body, but others close up to his face, eyes, claws, teeth… it’s an uncomfortable experience since John doesn’t like his photo taken at the best of times, but especially not now when he looks like a complete freak of nature. And then John goes to the bedroom to do some deep breathing and try to rid himself of his demonic appearance, because it’s hard to sit and relax when he knows he looks like _that_. So Alex finishes up the appointment for him. 

“Is there anything we can do about this? How to get rid of the change?” he asks as Lights packs up her things. 

“Truthfully, this is where my expertise runs dry,” she explains regretfully. “I don’t know anything about the demon that caused the change, so I can’t confidently say that this gift is only temporary. I would hope it is, but ‘temporary’ to a misbehaving demon could mean years regardless. I’m sorry. Text me a day that you’re both free next week, and we can visit the alleyway where John believes this happened. I may be able to get a supernatural reading there, but there are no guarantees.”

Alex knows these aren’t exactly the answers they’d been hoping for, but it was better than no answers at all. He waves Lights off with a somewhat heavy heart, and goes to break the news that all was not solved yet to his boyfriend. 

+++

“This is stupid. I don’t feel anything! I don’t recognise anything. It’s just an alley with trashcans and… probably, like, old condoms or fuckin’ needles or something. We should just leave.” 

“John, would you shut up and let her get a reading?” Alex snaps, growing tired of his boyfriend’s complaints. “I know you feel like this is a lost cause but even if you don’t feel anything, Lights might. So just… shush, okay?” 

John huffs, crossing his arms and wandering back out onto the main street in silence. He knows he’s being difficult, but it just all feels so pointless. 

He doesn’t even feel smug when Lights comes back from the end of the alley with a shrug and a forlorn expression, because Alex looks so damn sad for him. The truth is, John has pretty much resigned himself to this being the rest of his life. He didn’t have any hopes of Lights getting a reading in the first place. 

“I can’t get anything,” she says sadly. “There’s, like… a hint of something in the very back corner of the alley, so I imagine that’s possibly where the demon was residing the most when it was hanging around this area? But… who knows if it stills lingers here or not. I wouldn’t imagine it does. It might re-visit but I have no idea when. I’m sorry, John.” 

“Do we have any next steps?” Alex interjects before John can thank her for her time. 

“Regrettably… no,” Lights gives them a sympathetic smile. “I really am sorry. But I have no means to ‘change’ John back to normal and nothing to find here to help me give you more answers. I’m afraid the only advice I have is to be vigilant about when you feel the demonic side emerging, and keep it hidden from the public. I can’t police who you talk to about it… but just be really careful.” 

John nods, already knowing that would probably be the outcome. “Thanks, anyway. I don’t really intend to tell anyone that isn’t Alex. Or you.” 

The three of them walk back towards their cars in silence, with Alex getting into he and John’s first after bidding Lights a defeated goodbye. Lights places a hand on John’s arm to stop him getting in the passenger side.

“John… stay in touch. You both have my number. If you need to talk to someone about this and you’d rather it wasn’t always Alex… just shoot me a text. And if anything changes with your demon self or… just anything, call me, let me know. I’ll try and help. No charge.” 

John blinks, a bit surprised. “Uh, thank-you. Of course, but… no charge? This is your job.” 

Lights shrugs, laughing. “It’s a side-job, my husband and I live comfortably enough. You guys have paid me for the last two sessions… I don’t want any more. I just wanna help.” 

“That’s incredibly kind of you,” John reaches to hug her, and it’s brief, but he’s not really a hugger when it comes to people he doesn’t know very well, so for him, it feels like a big gesture. “Thank-you, really. We’ll see you around.”

“Try not to let it get you down. You can still live a mostly normal life, for however long this lasts.”

John supposes she’s right. But it still feels like a huge adjustment. 

+++

“I have to move out. Or you have to move out. Or… I’ll go stay at a hotel for a while. I just have to be away from you.”

“John, you are being beyond ridiculous right now.”

They’d been having the discussion for near on an hour and it was just going in circles. Their trip to the alley with Lights was three weeks prior, and since then, John had managed to accidentally startle Alex at least six times by going into his demon form in moments of rage, or worse, lust -- grabbing Alex and trying to grope and kiss him before realising it was freaking him out. 

“It’s the only way! I need-- I’ll just stay away until this goes away.” 

“Are you hearing yourself? What if you’re like this for years, then what? You want me to just wait around for you for decades? I love you and you’re not going anywhere.” 

“It’s the only way!” John repeats, grabbing a backpack and beginning to shovel t-shirts and underwear into it. “You’ll be safer!” 

Alex sighs, pressing the heels of his hands into his eyes. This was exhausting. “You’re not _listening_ to me!” 

“I’ve made up my mind, we just need to be apart for… a while, I’ll figure this out, I’ll fix it.” 

“John!” 

“You can’t stop me.” 

Alex had just about had enough of the conversation. It’s not getting them anywhere, and John continues to pack his things. So Alex does the only logical thing he can really think of in the moment -- he tackles his boyfriend onto the bed and pins him there. 

Okay, so maybe it wasn’t the _best_ thing he could’ve done, but Alex isn’t always great at thinking on his feet. 

He presses John’s arms into the mattress and kisses him, and John fights back, trying to squirm away from his mouth.

  
“Alex, what the hell are you doing?!”

“I’m trying to get you to snap out of this! You’re not listening to a word I’m saying! I don’t need you to go anywhere, I don’t need space from you, I don’t need you to stay away from me, I don’t need any of that. I realise you’ve ‘made up your mind’ but you did that without any regard for how I’m feeling, and I feel safe with you! _You don't need to go anywhere._ Do you hear me?”

Alex lets out a breath, panting from finally getting to say his piece, and John just looks at him in confusion.

“But I thought it scared you? How strong I can get, and how it looked?”

“John, I know you wouldn’t hurt me. We already know you’re not possessed. It’s not like you lose _all_ control. It’s still you.” 

“But…” 

“John, listen to me. You moving out or avoiding me won’t fix anything. And besides, who would you have to talk to about the whole thing if you did leave? I’m here to support you, just let me do that. You’re getting better and better at controlling your demon form every day. It startles me sometimes, sure, when I’m not expecting it. But we’re both still adjusting. I want to work through it together.”

The words finally began to sink in, and John stays quiet for a moment before he nods. 

“I love you,” he says, almost on autopilot. Alex never failed to be there for him and support him. “I do.” 

“I love you too,” Alex whispers, leaning down to press another softer kiss to John’s lips. 

When he pulls away, their eyes meet, and it feels like something shifts. With everything John had been going through, intimacy hadn’t been top of their list of things to do. 

In a second, they’re both caught up in a lustful kiss, open-mouthed and desperate to be closer to one another despite it not being physically possible. That’s all it really takes for John’s change to happen, and Alex feels a heat flash through his body. He pulls away and stares at his boyfriend, now accompanied by horns, black eyes, and the hint of fangs.

It only makes him want John more, and he dives back into the kiss, biting at his boyfriend’s lower lip. 

John’s claws catch on Alex’s shirt but he doesn’t care. It’s the least of his worries. 

“Just rip it,” Alex breathes in John’s ear. “It’s an old one. The pants too. Just rip them.” 

John doesn’t need to be told twice. He grips the fabric with purpose and yanks at it, and the sound of clothes ripping is more erotic than Alex ever thought it would be. He laughs as he feels his shirt torn from his body, and John shreds the faded pair of old sweatpants with just as much ease. It’s clumsier work trying to remove John’s outfit but Alex still gets him undressed in under a minute, so he counts that as a success. 

“I want you to fuck me,” he states, holding John’s face in his hands. John’s eyes are black, black all over, like a shark’s. It makes Alex shiver. He decides to correct his statement. “I need you to fuck me.” 

John doesn’t move for a few seconds, but then he grins, and Alex doesn’t think he’s ever seen John smile in his demon form. 

In one quick motion that takes Alex by surprise, John scoops him up under his thighs and carries him to the wall. With his strength heightened, John presses Alex’s back to the wall and lifts him higher. He has his hands under Alex’s thighs, lifting him up enough that John’s mouth is level with his cock.

Eagerly, John buries his face against Alex’s balls, tongue spreading warm spit over them. He moans, taking both of Alex’s balls in his mouth. Alex is gasping for air, partly alarmed at being so high in the air, but partly in awe of John’s strength. He doesn’t seem to be having any trouble holding Alex the way he is, despite never being one to focus on building physical strength as a human. Alex pushes at John’s head, silently asking for more, and John is happy to oblige. He tugs gently at Alex’s balls as he releases them from his mouth, and then quickly engulfs his cock. He gags around Alex’s dick, and Alex bucks his hips as best he can in the position he’s in -- he feels safe, he knows John will keep him held up. Alex feels like his spine has been lit on fire, and he presses his heels into John’s back, not wanting him to stop. His fingers grope at John’s hair, and he feels his horns hidden in the tangled mess. 

“Oh God,” he mutters, wondering briefly why it’s so sexy to him, but just as quickly deciding he doesn’t care. “Oh my God, John.” 

John wants to fuck his boyfriend. He so badly wants to fuck his boyfriend. The desire he feels for him and him alone is overwhelming. But he can’t bring himself to stop sucking Alex’s dick just yet. It’s pressed to the back of his throat and he can’t stop gagging but it’s okay because Alex is moaning and whining like John’s never heard before. 

When John does eventually stop, drool coating his chin and eyes still dark as ever, Alex smiles. He touches John’s cheek, feeling such a wave of fondness for him. 

“You look beautiful,” he murmurs. “As beautiful as you do when you’re human and I love you just as much.” 

It only increases John’s lust tenfold, and he turns and throws Alex down on the bed before he knows what’s hit him. John pushes Alex’s legs up to his chest, and licks down over his balls, over his perineum, and stops at his ass. Alex gasps and whines, asshole clenching under John’s tongue. 

He keeps going, his nose pressed to Alex’s balls. 

Alex grips the sheets, gasping as John pulls out all the stops to make him feel good. Better than good -- like he was absolutely flying. John lets up eventually, which is good because Alex was starting to see spots from how fast he was breathing. He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand and starts digging in their bedside table, coming up triumphant with a little bottle of PleasureGlide lubricant. 

He only pauses when he remembers he has claws. 

“Alex-- I can’t-- I’ll hurt you,” he says simply, holding up his hand. 

“I’ll do it,” Alex resolves, taking the lube from John’s hand. 

He slides two fingers into himself right off the bat, slowly, gently, and begins moving them after a couple of seconds. Twisting, pressing, rubbing all the right spots. He makes soft noises as he pushes in as far as he can, toes pressing into the mattress. John’s cock twitches as he watches this play out, stomach doing flips at the sight of his gorgeous boyfriend putting on such a show. 

John strokes some of the lube onto his dick while Alex preps himself -- the show just for an audience of one. It doesn’t take him long to build up to three fingers, eagerly spreading himself open and wiping his hand on the sheets when he decides he’s ready.

John pushes at Alex, rolling him over onto belly. He grips his cheeks, relishing in the way the ample flesh feels under his claws as he squeezes. 

“Fuck me already, please,” Alex mumbles, rolling back over onto his back and pulling John in close. “I want to be facing you. I want to see your eyes.” 

Alex had never felt so aroused by John’s eyes before. They seem to glitter when John slides inside him, inch by inch filling him up. Alex squirms where he’s laying, not interested in waiting too long to adjust. He waits until the stretch doesn’t feel quite so intense and then tilts his hips up with a moan, looking for a deeper press. 

“John, _fuck me_ ,” he insists, biting at his lover’s jaw. “ _Please_.” 

John doesn’t need to be told twice -- he leans up on his hands, looking down between their bodies so he can watch his cock slide in and out of Alex as he fucks him, hard. He picks up a fast pace, hips snapping back and forth, the sound of skin smacking against skin filling the room. Alex gasps and bites his lip and runs his hands through John’s hair, fingers tracing the base of his horns. 

Usually they like to take it a little slower when they have sex -- savour each other, draw it out, tease. But this time it’s all raw lust and neither of them can face the idea of slowing it down. Any time John’s stamina starts to wane, Alex wraps his legs over John’s thighs and pushes up against him, urging him on. 

“Keep fucking me like that,” he begs. “I don’t want you to stop. Fuck me. Make me scream.” 

John complies, biting at Alex’s shoulder. His sharpened teeth draw blood, but it only serves to add to the experience, and honestly, Alex barely feels it. 

John can’t last forever though, and when he knows he’s getting close, he decides to change it up a little. He sits upright, legs folded under his body, but leaves Alex laying down, and fucks into him that way. The dramatic change in angle has Alex crying out, groping at the sheets and trying to squirm away from the intensity of it. John grabs his hips and holds him there, eyes darker than ever as he pounds into him with all the strength he can muster. Alex is practically sobbing with pleasure when John starts to jerk him off; it only takes some precise thumb rolls over the head for Alex to cum over his own stomach, and John quickly follows. 

John pulls out after he’s caught his breath, turning to lay down beside Alex on the bed. It only takes a minute before he transforms back, demon form melting away, and when Alex turns to look at him… all he sees is John. Back to normal. 

He smiles, and John sheepishly smiles back. 

“So… how was that for you?” 

Alex laughs, kissing his nose. “You make a really hot demon.” 

+++

It was only a matter of time before someone other than Alex or Lights discovered John’s… abilities. 

That someone happened to be Rian Dawson. 

Long-time friend of Alex’s and probably the nicest guy anyone could ever meet, so it could’ve been worse. Well, maybe. John wanted to die of embarrassment, demon form or not. 

“Guys, seriously!” Rian complains, shielding his eyes. “If you’re gonna fuck on the couch, at least lock your door?” 

“Or maybe you could knock instead of barging into _our_ apartment?” Alex says, a little rattled as he tugs his underwear up his legs and ushers John to the bedroom. 

“Did he see? Do you think he saw?” John whispers in a panic, clothes bundled in his arms. Alex had never seen him look so worried in his demon form before. “He must’ve saw.” 

“Just-- shh, go get dressed and calm down.” 

“Okay, yeah, fair enough, but still!” Rian was still shouting from near the front door. “Lock it before you have kinky sex!” 

“What makes you think it was kinky?” Alex asks as he rushes back to where Rian is, heart hammering in his chest. 

“Uh, if it wasn’t kinky, then why the hell was John wearing devil horns and like… black contacts? What the hell?” 

“What? Um. He-- he-- uh…” 

“Look, I don’t need to know all the weird roleplay shit you’re into but it doesn’t surprise me that mythical creatures are your thing. I can never play Dungeons and Dragons with you again, Gaskarth. Do you have any lemonade, by the way? I’m so thirsty.” 

Alex had never breathed a bigger sigh of relief as he watches Rian head into his kitchen to invade the fridge. Roleplay. Of course. He thought John was all dressed up, in a headband with horns and stick-on claws and coloured contact lenses from a horror shop.

“Just because you’re a vanilla little bitch,” he retorts, righting himself. 

So maybe Rian didn’t find out about John’s _abilities_ exactly… it was just lucky that the incident could be explained away with something as simple as a slightly out-of-the-ordinary fetish. They laughed it off. 

John wasn’t so lucky when it was one of his own friends. 

He’s known Pat a long time, and much like Rian, Pat’s a lovely guy. Super nice. Doesn’t have a bad word to say about anyone. Even so, John wasn’t exactly champing at the bit to tell people he’d become a demon. Alex knew, and Lights knew, but she was an expert. Rian… sort of knew, in a weird fetishy way. That was more than enough. 

Eight months since the transformation had passed overall (and one since Rian accidentally stumbling upon John’s new look) and John had actually begun to find himself in more control of it. Often, he had discovered he was able to choose when to transform, along with sometimes being able to suppress it. He didn’t get irrationally angry and transform over small things any more… usually, he was able to calm himself and stop the transformation from happening. 

Well. At least, most of the time.

His temper would still spiral, usually helped along if he’d already had a bad day. 

It was on one of those bad days that Pat found out.

It felt like everything that could’ve went wrong had done just that. John’s alarm clock broke in the night, making him late for his morning shift at work. He stepped in a puddle on the way into work, and he had to do his shift with one uncomfortably damp foot. He burned himself making someone a hot chocolate. After work, he’d went home to get changed and ready to pick up Pat so they could go play football in the park with some other guys, and in the process of having a coffee before he left… he dropped and broke his favourite mug. On the way to the park with Pat, the weather got much worse to the point someone sent a text to their group chat saying the game had been rained off -- there was a storm brewing and they didn’t want to be running around an open field if there was lightning. Fair enough, but kind of a bummer. Pat suggests he and John just hit up a movie instead, which John was happy enough with, but all the little things had chipped away at his patience. The icing on the cake was people driving like idiots in bad weather. 

John manages to hold back until someone cuts him off, causing him to slam on his brakes. He skids a little, just for a second, but ultimately it’s okay, despite all the water on the road. 

“You fucking moron!” John bellows, picking up speed again and slamming on his horn repeatedly. “What a goddamn asshole, you could’ve killed us, you lunatic! How fucking dare you?!” 

John’s all but snarling, and he smacks the horn several more times. He felt so angry he hadn’t even realised his fingernails had grown into claws, and all the rest. 

Pat was aghast at the outburst. He’d never seen John get road rage, even if it was kind of justified. He turns his head to ask his friend if he’s okay, and does a double-take. 

“John, what the fuck?!” 

“That guy almost made us crash!” John yells in response, gesturing at the car that’s now way ahead. 

“What’s wrong with your-- what’s-- why do you have black eyes?!” 

John blinks, realising exactly what’s happened, and he quickly pulls over before he actually _does_ crash from shaking so badly.

“Pat, don’t-- don’t panic, I’m not-- I’m still me, it’s me,” John scrambles to reassure him as he cuts the engine, fearful that Pat’s just going to bolt right out of the car and call the police or something. 

“How did you fucking do that?” Pat breathes, twisting his full body to face John, but keeping as far back as possible. “What’s wrong with your-- your hands? And-- how…?” 

The adrenaline rushing through John’s system quickly overcame any rage he’d been feeling, and right in front of Pat, he transforms back again. No claws, no horns, no sharp teeth, nothing. Just John again. 

Pat yelps in shock at actually _seeing_ the change happen, and turns to grope for the door handle. 

“Don’t!” John shouts, lunging forward and grabbing his friend’s wrists. “Please, don’t. I’m not-- please just listen. Please. I know this is really freaky but please don’t run. I’m not… dangerous.” 

Pat had never felt more terrified… but John was one of his very best friends. He didn’t want to run from him. He swallows and relaxes in his seat a little, gently pulling his arms away from John’s grip. 

“Okay. Uh. What… the fuck did I just…” 

“Th-this… this is a huge secret, Pat. You cannot, _cannot_ , tell anyone what you just saw. Ever. This is some take-to-your-grave shit, okay? Can you promise me? Alex knows and you can talk to him about it, but you’re never to tell another soul, ever. Please.” 

Pat nods dumbly, completely taken in by the desperation on John’s face. 

“Right,” John takes a deep breath, feeling somewhat calmed by the rain battering his windshield. “Here we go.” 

+++

“I can’t believe my best friend’s the devil.”

“A _demon_. Not _the_ devil.”

“Right, sorry. Is the devil even actually a demon of any kind? Or is he--” 

“Pat.” 

“Sorry. That’s… wow, John.” 

“I know.” 

“I won’t tell anyone, I swear.” 

John’s relieved. If anyone was going to understand, he should’ve known it would be Pat. Pat always believed the best in people, no matter how terrible they appeared. Apparently that extended to evil mythical beings. Good to know.

“How do you feel about it?” Pat asks after a moment of quiet. 

John blinks at him in surprise. “Um. Like… the thing overall or the fact that you know?” 

“Well. Both, I guess.” 

“I, um… I’m actually kind of relieved that someone else knows,” John admits. “I mean, not that that’s me giving you the okay to tell anyone else. Or that I’m saying I’m going to. I wanna keep the circle of people who know about this pretty tiny. Miniscule, even. You, Alex, and Lights… that’s more than enough.” 

“And Rian.” 

“Oh, shut up.” 

Pat smiles. “Okay. I’m glad you’re not upset. And, overall…?” 

“Overall… I… I kind of feel alright, I guess? I was angry and scared at first, obviously. And sort of… just really depressed that this might be my new normal for some indefinite amount of time? But it’s been months and I have more control. Clearly that didn’t come in so handy today but… maybe in another few months I’ll be able to control it completely? And just choose to change whenever I please? Alex is really supportive about it, which helps so much. And it’s great being able to call up Lights and kinda rant about it… and she’s really, really cool and nice and I think I could probably call her a friend of Alex and I now, so that’s a good thing that came out of it.” 

“The weird demon sex is probably also an upside, right?” 

John laughs a little. “Yeah… yeah, okay, that too. I think I’d miss that.” 

+++

It’s a year to the day when Alex, John, Lights, and her five-year-old daughter Rocket all meet for coffee and cake in John’s workplace. 

“Can’t believe you’re coming in here on your days off now, you weirdo,” Ashley laughs as she places their orders on the table, her once long blue hair now cropped boyishly short and bleach blonde. “Was it me you missed or just the caffeine buzz?” 

“I had to let my loved ones experience the charm of being served by you,” John retorts with a smile.

Rocket digs into her cake first, wolfing it down in what seems like seconds before heading to the play corner -- the cafe’s quiet and she has all the toys to herself. She’s the spitting image of her mother, from the spindly limbs to the braided hair. Rocket’s is dyed baby pink, a toned down version of Lights’ fire engine red shade. 

“So. Alex tells me it’s your demon-versary,” Lights smiles gently at John once she’s sure Rocket is out of earshot. “How’re you feeling?” 

John shares a look with Alex, and it’s almost sad. Almost. 

“Been counting down the days for a while. I kind of thought… maybe hoped… that I would go back to normal today? But it hasn’t happened,” John blinks to make his point, eyes black, and then blinks again… back to green. “Still demon. It’s not like it’s the worst thing in the world. I can control it almost completely now. And I guess… this _is_ my normal now. It would be weird to change back? I guess it’s like having a superpower at this point, rather than… a curse. I don’t really know. I think all that’s really happened is I’ve come to terms with it and learned to live with it. And only managed to spill the secret to one friend.” 

Lights looks thoughtful. “Well, two, if you count Rian thinking that you guys--” 

“Would everyone quit bringing that up?!” 

Lights and Alex just laugh, and John rolls his eyes. Lights breaks out her trusty pen and notepad, and starts scribbling a few quick things. 

“So you have almost total control now. Anything else different?” 

“Not really. We took a drive to the alleyway this morning before we came to meet you but… it’s still just an alleyway. Doesn’t feel like anything. I thought maybe that might change today. I don’t think we’re gonna learn anything else about it. Why it happened or whatever.” 

Lights tapped her notes with the pen. “That’s why we’re documenting progress. There’s always more to learn.” 

John shrugs and picks up his coffee mug to take a sip, but Lights reaches across the table to touch his arm, looking at him intently. 

“No, John, seriously,” she says, gently squeezing his wrist. “I’m proud of how far you’ve come. When we met, you… you were in despair. And it was understandable, but you seem so confident now. You’re at ease with it. It’s not an ideal situation but you embraced it and you’re doing so great now.”

John feels bashful but Alex chips in, kissing his boyfriend on the cheek. “She’s right, y’know. You seem really happy. I’m proud of you too. I’d even go as far as saying you kind of _like_ that you have this secret ability. Kind of a lot.” 

John looks at his boyfriend wryly, just as Rocket comes racing back to the table and practically collides with it. 

“Mommy, Mommy! Did you tell them about my party?!” she asks urgently. 

“Oh, what? A party?” Alex grins, poking Rocket’s side to tickle her. “Is it gonna be your birthday soon?” 

“Uh, in about five months, yeah,” Lights laughs. “Her cousin just had a birthday so Rocket’s decided to get a serious headstart in planning her own, and you’re both invited.” 

“It’s gonna be a dress-up party like Hallowe’en!” Rocket claps her hands together. “Everybody has to come as monsters!” 

“Well I guess John’s got a costume all figured out for it already!” Alex says, turning to tickle his boyfriend instead. “Don’t you, babe?”

It only takes one glance at each other before Alex, John, and Lights are in peals of laughter, with Rocket looking on, confused. 

“Mom? What’s so funny? What’s funny?” she asks, tugging at Lights’ shorts. “Why are you laughing?”

John dabs tears of laughter from his eyes, shaking his head. “We’re just really excited for your party, Rocket.” 

+++

“I can’t believe it’s been a whole year,” Alex says as they lay in bed that night, plugging his phone in to charge. 

“Probably doesn’t seem that long for you because I tried to hide it,” John notes, placing his bookmark into his book and putting it neatly on his bedside table. “I did keep it a secret for a little while.” 

“That’s true,” Alex nods, turning toward his boyfriend. “I really meant what I said earlier, John. I’m very proud of you. And it’s okay if you actually kind of like the fact you can turn into something else. It’s crazy and surreal and a bit scary but… it’s also really cool. So it’s okay if you enjoy it now, y’know? I mean, hell, I enjoy it. It took some getting used to, it kept taking me by surprise when you’d turn when I wasn’t expecting it, but… I like it. It’s… yeah, I really like it.” 

John smirks just a little. “You _really_ like it?” 

“Oh, come on. Surely you know that. I don’t know why, I don’t know what it is, but your demon side is… really kind of sexy. In that sense, it is most _definitely_ a gift, not a curse.” 

“A gift, huh?” John continues to smirk, leaning in closer to Alex. 

Alex smiles back, reaching to cup John’s chin. “Mhm.”

“I’m gonna show you just how gifted I am.” 

“You’re so fucking cheesy,” Alex laughs.

It’s the last thing he gets to say before John tackles Alex, eyes playfully turning dark before he kisses him.


End file.
